Quick Ways To Neutralize Sexual Harassment At Work

[caption id="attachment_832881" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Casual portrait of an african american business woman using technology in a bright and sunny startup with the team in the background[/caption] Getting human resources to accept and file a sexual harassment claim can be, unfortunately, rather difficult. Getting them to take action against the harasser can be even more difficult, and by the time all of the forms have been filed, the meetings have been held and the reprimands have been made, you could still have suffered plenty of abuse. In an ideal world, you wouldn’t even need to be prepared to deal with sexual harassment in the workplace, but this is not an ideal world. Furthermore, even the men who consider themselves “woke” can be decades behind on what it means to treat a female coworker with respect (or any female, really). Since we often have to fend for ourselves, here are ways to quickly neutralize sexual harassment in the workplace. [caption id="attachment_709009" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Call him out in private

Give the person one shot to admit they didn’t realize they were making you uncomfortable, should that be the case. Even if a man doesn’t think he’s sexually harassing you at work, the mere suggestion that he could get in trouble or face some sort of trouble with human resources could make him stop his behavior. It doesn’t matter if you get him to agree with you or see the wrong in his ways; it just matters that he understands there could be consequences, and stops.         [caption id="attachment_745107" align="alignleft" width="600"] shutterstock_[/caption]

Repeat what he said, loudly

If calling the offender out privately doesn’t stop his behavior, make him contend with how it feels when everyone stares at him for it. Next time he says something like, “Your legs look nice in that” say, loudly, “What did you just say? That my legs look nice?!” Say it loud enough for everyone to hear, so they’re witnesses. A lot of offenders talk a big game and say they aren’t worried about you calling them out, until they actually have all eyes on them. The offender has the option to defend himself and say, “No, I didn’t say that” but now you’ve shown him you’re willing to call him out in public. [caption id="attachment_702372" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Know your rights and the language

Read up on the workplace conduct handbook that human resources gave you when you got this job. This way, you can tell him exactly what code he is breaking and what inappropriate behavior he is doing. If you sound like you know the law in and out, you could scare the harasser off. Language like, “You’re bothering me” may not cut it but language like, “You’re violating code XYZ” can remind the offender of legal implications of his actions.         [caption id="attachment_702843" align="alignleft" width="419"] Shutterstock[/caption]  

Ask if they’d say that to a man

Ask the offender if he’d say what he said to a man. Ask him why not. Pester him to explain himself and break down his own behavior. Make yourself someone who is not worth bothering. Remember the harasser probably A) hopes you’ll respond positively to his advances or B) gets a rise out of making you uncomfortable. If you make this a debate, he won’t get what he wanted.         [caption id="attachment_713311" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Save the message, and let them know it

If the offender harasses you via email, text message, or any written word, take a screen shot of his words and show it to him. Ask if him he thinks what he wrote was okay. Let him know you have that on file now.             [caption id="attachment_695505" align="alignleft" width="500"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Tell them they have a reputation

Speak to other people in the office who you believe have been harassed by this person. Make an agreement that you’re all willing to take him to human resources, of even to court, if he doesn’t stop his behavior. The harasser probably thinks that his victims remain silent, but if you let him know he has a reputation for this type of behavior, and a group of people is willing to go up against him, he could back off. Sexual harassers often rely on their victims to be afraid to speak up, which leaves them isolated. Let him know that’s not the case this time.       [caption id="attachment_701574" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Flip to the handbook

Bookmark the page in the handbook that goes over what constitutes as harassment, and even highlight the lines that detail the types of things he’s doing. Next time he does any of those things, pull out that handbook, open that page, and shove it in his face.             [caption id="attachment_717697" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Pull out the forms

You could already have complaint forms ready to go in your drawer. You could have already filled out his name and details of past events. Offenders usually don’t believe you’ll take action, but if you show them you’re already well on your way, it could make them stop their behavior.             [caption id="attachment_612042" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Point to the surveillance cameras

If you really want to frighten your offender, hang out near the surveillance cameras a bit more. This way, next time he bothers you, you can point to the cameras and let him know everything he just did is on surveillance. You could also take out your phone each time he speaks to you and say, “I’m going to record this conversation.”     [caption id="attachment_620857" align="alignleft" width="420"] Corbis[/caption]

Move away, in no uncertain terms

Don’t worry about being polite to someone who sexually harasses his coworkers—he doesn’t deserve respect. Move away abruptly and sharply—in a way everyone notices—if he touches you. Don’t be afraid to make a scene. The drama queen gets left alone.

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